Wednesday, March 3, 2010

A Promise To Keep, Kept.

I hope you all took the time to go back and read my post about Berlancia because it has everything to do with what I am about to tell you. If you didn't stop right now and take a few minutes to catch up.

A year and a half ago I made a promise to a special little girl. A month and a half ago my life was turned upside down. A week and a half ago that promise got a name. Espwa Berlancia. In creole it means Berlancia's Hope. Hope is what I have, for Berlancia's Memory, for my future plans and for Haiti.

I can not possibly begin to count the number of times I have heard the dreaded question "what's next?" in the last few weeks. Every time someone asked I could feel myself tense up. I tried to keep "that" look off of my face. I forced myself to mumble something acceptable and then changed the subject as fast as I could. I couldn't face the future when I wasn't done letting go of the past. I was confused, I was lost, I was searching. I needed God to swoop in, pick me up and put me in the place He chose. I knew I was waiting but I didn't know what for. This past week He showed me.

It's a huge and scary place to be in, working for God. Not following in the worlds footsteps but instead walking in His way. Following the path He has lain for me. I don't want it to sound like this was something that was easy for me. In fact, it's the exact opposite. It is one of the hardest things I have ever done. It is not comfortable for me to just trust that if I do the work God is calling me to do I will be taken care of. I don't know why, I've done it before and I've never lacked for anything. But that was there, this is here. Can I really be a "missionary" in Montana? I have to believe that I can, because He told me to. That doesn't take away those moments of freak out, where I decided that I must go out and find a real job. But it does give me clarity in those moments. I just have to believe that if I do the work God wants me to do I will be taken care of. So, I give it to Him. "If it's God's will, it's God's bill" ;)

So what is my job?

I'm excited to tell you! Espwa Berlancia is a non-profit organization I have set up to help the people of Haiti. I don't know entirely what our mission will be yet but I do know that quite a bit of information has come my way in the last few days. These are things I believe are being put before me for a reason. One of my greatest passions in Haiti are the babies who are infected with HIV. I have learned a lot about those babies! I didn't know that with proper treatment and preventative care a woman who is HIV+ has only 2% chance of passing the virus on to her child. The problem is making that care available. I didn't know all the information behind this disease. Slowly I am learning and I am putting what I learn together to try and understand where I am supposed to focus that knowledge. I know that one of my main projects this year will be for the family that I have shared with all of you. I know they need a house and right now I will make phone calls, email and do whatever it takes to make sure that happens. Beyond that, God will show me. Today I am working harder than I ever have before. I don't leave "work" at the end of the day. I am always going and I've never been happier! I have never been more content in what I am doing and where I am putting my energy! I have come to realize that even though I am not in Haiti, Haiti is in me. I have known since April 2nd 2008 that Haiti is my life passion, it is what I was created for. It is everything I have ever loved. It is what captured me and brought the wholeness of my heart out! It is what consumes my every second. How is it that I am so blessed to be allowed to do what I love every day. God is so good to me!

I can't wait to see what Berlancia's Hope will bring!


Holly said...

i am so excited about this! can't wait to hear more! you are awesome rhyan! berlancia will forever be remembered and will inspire and change other people's lives forever through the work God has put before you...AMEN!

Anonymous said...

Rhyan, This is AWESOME! I can't wait to hear more about this. You are doing an awesome job, I knw that Berlancia will NEVER be forgtten. With the passion and love you have for her, she will not be forgotten. If you need ANYTHING I am more then willing to help you in anyway I can, you can find my contact info on facebook. I know that with God's help you can do anything!
Brittany Schlichting

Beth said...

I found your blog from Kelly's Korner and I am so inspired by your posts! I'll for sure be checking back :)


Maggie said...

God is amazing... and as I am said to you before... I think he has brought you and I together for a reason. ;)

Lea said...

I am so delighted to hear that you are finding your way ... and His way! B is such an inspiration ... keep in touch as you define your mission. Chris and I are inspired by and behind you 100%.

Anonymous said...

How will you support yourself while you start this endeavour? Donations? Will you work elsewhere?

Anonymous said...

Rhyan! We have never met, but I know of you and I have read a bit of your blog here and there. B was one of mine - Anna passed her along to me before she left Haiti in 2008. B and another special angel baby are my drive to live each day in a way that honours them and God. I am so excited for this new adventure of yours! If you ever need anything, I am also very passionate about HIV and Haiti and would love to help you in any way I can. I am a student nurse and I am from Alberta. I read that you are in Montana? Anywhere close to Baab or St. Mary's by any chance? Would love to meet you one day and my partner's family has a cabin at Duck Lake, Montana. Anyway, good luck with everything. Keep following where He leads! Sincerely, Alex Shiels