How beautiful are the feet of those who bring good news!
How much more precious are the feet of those who receive it!
I think, so many times it is easy to get caught up in the comforts of life. We become lazy. We are so wrapped up in demanding that we forget what we are truly here to do.
It’s a fight that I struggle with often in Haiti. White people here are elite, I can’t sugar coat that. Haitian’s work in the homes of the white people. They serve us and I hate it. Even here at GLA we have cooks who prepare and serve our meals, household staff that washes our dishes, mops our floors and does our laundry. We have someone to carry jugs of drinking water into our house and someone to clean dog poop in our yard. There is always someone who’s “job” it is to do the dirty work that none of us want to do. I hate it! I hate that the people I want to badly to serve are the ones serving me. I hate that they cook our meals, the most delicious food I have ever eaten, and never taste any of it. I hate that when we watch movies in the evenings, on the comfortable couches, they stand in the kitchen and watch from “their” place. I hate everything about it!
The poorest of foreign aid workers in Haiti are richer than the average Haitian. The “uneducated” Canadian has received more schooling and training than most Haitian people will ever dream of. The hardest physical labor an America will experience is nothing more than the every day activities of the people here.
I didn’t ask to be “better” than them. I had no control over where I was born and the life I have lived. I have no power but I still feel guilty. I feel guilty when I look in the eyes of a person who is hungry and don’t give him something to eat because we are taught that we can’t hand food out or people will mob us. I feel guilty when a child sees my white skin and immediately asks me for “one dollar” I feel guilty that they are taught that the white people are so far above them that the best they can do is beg us for help. I feel guilty when I don’t give him a dollar, because I know he needs it. I feel guilty when I do, because I know it just solidifies the cycle. I feel guilty that the people I came to serve give me more than I will ever bring to them. And then, I feel guilty when I don’t feel guilty…
Ok, so I feel guilty, what am I going to do about it? When will I decided to stop feeling guilty put my love into action?