I don’t really have a lot to say. As wonderful and beautiful a Christmas season with family is, it’s not what I crave. I would exchange every moment here for the gift of being at home with a little one to hold.
It’s New Year’s Eve, in general a holiday that I find a bit overrated and disappointing. In years past there has been this idea to “bring it in with a bang” dressing up, drinking too much sweet champagne. “The” countdown. The expectancy and pressure for the world to change in the 60 seconds that it takes for the calendars to change.
In reality very little does change. Aside from 3 weeks of trying to train myself to write the proper digit at the end of a date, my life has yet to be altered drastically at midnight of any given December 31st. Up until last January I didn’t think that 60 seconds was enough time for any big change to occur in my life. Then I realized that in much less time than that everything can be turned upside-down. 45 seconds of January 12th felt like hours, I try to picture what 15 more would have added, I can’t. My idea of how small 60 seconds is but a memory now.
This December 31st I feel myself placing even more hope and expectation on what the New Year means.Does it mean that in the next few hours I will say goodbye to the last 12 months? That the slate will be wiped clean and we will be given a new view on the world? There are so many things I wish I could throw away with the 2010 calendar tonight, memories that I wish I could erase. There are so many reason for me to cheer and bid goodbye to this mess of months. But nestled among those things are memories of miracles and hope. Lives I now know and children I love, all because life went on.
I have been guilty in the past year of talking too much about the pain in Haiti. I have been quick to point out the sad stories and to paint pictures of despair. It’s easy to do when it’s all around you. What’s not so easy it to take a few extra second and look around at the things that capture so many to Haiti. The beauty, the love and the joy that I am blessed with should be known!
The next 2 weeks will not be easy ones. I will struggle I know, over memories that are sure to present themselves. An anniversary has a way of taking you back to places you might rather not go. I know I will deal with these things in my own way. One of the ways I have chosen is to spend the next 12 days, leading up to the 12th of January and the one year anniversary of the quake, sharing with you “Ayiti Bel” (Beautiful Haiti). The things that I love, the things that make me smile, the things that God has given us to remind us of his presence.
Take some time with me to rejoice in the blessings of this nation.