There are a lot of things I hate.
I hate trying to write blog posts with I am in the US. Mostly because there is nothing that happens here that comes close to filling me with the urgency that I see and experience every day in Haiti.
I hate empty, quite hours. Time where I am free to do work that desperately needs to be done, but instead just cry over how quiet this house is.
I hate asking people for money.
I hate leaving Haiti.
I hate saying goodbye to the people I love, all the time.
I hate babies dying, for no good reason.
I hate discouragement that leads me to be frustrated with the people I am called to love.
I hate not having electricity when I want it.
I hate throwing “fits” over luxuries I crave like power and running water and my favorite TV shows, that are filled with materialistic crap anyway.
I hate watching what I say, and editing my posts before I publish them to make sure that I’m not offending anyone.
I hate the doubt that invades my thoughts every day, that we will actually raise this money and that this dream will become anything more.
I hate being away, from here and from there.
I hate when people use their energy to argue over theology and doctrine of our loving God, instead of the urgency of loving each other as He sees us.
I hate when I am fed up with answering the same questions over and over again, and respond with scripted answers, instead of love, joy and excitement.
I hate who I am when I am not there, and I hate who I want to be, when I am away from here.
I hate this world, which just reminds me it’s because I was made for so much more…